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Joke of the Day

"I hate ""save the date"" engagement cards. After divorce you should have to send out ""hey forget about that one date 6 months ago"" cards"

"How did the blind kid burn the side of his face? He answered the iron"

"Change your Facebook Status to ""I'm Pregnant"" or ""I'm Engaged"" and watch the April Fools LIKE & Comment away."

"I invented a new joke I invented a new word. Plagiarism. EDIT : This joke was invented by me and copyrighted. Dare to take it and a lawsuit shall find you."

"Why can't Russia extradite US top-secret whistle-blowers? Because they're Snowden (snowed-in). To all the folks on the East coast, stay safe and warm."

"My sleeping pills say don't mix with alcohol, but drop it in the glass and it dissolves just fine. Doctors think they know everything."

"Ever seen an elephant hiding in a cherry tree? No? Well, they must be hiding pretty good"

"What do you call a zoo where the only animal in the entire zoo is a dog? A shitzu."

"I see that your IQ test came back negative."

"What do you call an anorexic with a yeast infection? A Quarter-Pounder with Cheese."