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Joke of the Day

"Men ask us if we're naked when we tell them we're taking a bath. THAT'S why they pay more for their car insurance."

"Why does the prosecutor only choose jurors who drive Hummers? So that there's no chance of a hung jury"

"Me: I just need some time alone, please. *closes door* - Ma'am, if you're not trying on clothes, we'll need you to leave the dressing room."

"Why was the plumber sad? He had a shitty job."

"A man enters zoo enclosure to feed the tigers. succeeds"

"Why are TVs attracted to people? Because people turn them on"

"Whats the difference between 8 dicks and a joke?? Your mom cant take a joke."

"My kids are always accusing me of having a favorite child which is ridiculous because I don't really like any of them"

"Hey, are you cold? Go over to the corner, it's 90 degress"

"I remember the one time I was wrong... Turns out I was mistaken."