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Joke of the Day

"How many karma whores does it take to change a lightbulb? When this gets 700 up votes I'll let you know"

"""do you know why i pulled you ov.. are you.. pinocchio?"" yea, so what ""is that a hooker?"" uh.. nope, no *his nose hits the fuckin moon*"

"What is your best lawyer joke? I need some new material for the court house."

"How many planets are there in the solar system? There used to be nine, then there was eight and when I'm done with Uranus there'll be seven."

"Why are Jedis allowed to use negative numbers? Because only Siths deal in absolutes."

"Why can't the Maple Leafs have any tea? Because Boston has all the cups!"

"I hope you brought the divorce papers... Cuz your legs are about to be separated."

"Why did the little pig hide the soap? He heard the farmer yell ""Hogwash!"""

"What is white and interferes with the meal? An avalanche."

"You know what kills me? Weapons."