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Joke of the Day

"Light Yagami thought he was going to die on those stairs, but then he woke up the next day... And realized it was just a Near-Death experience."

"Why are there no feminists in Japan? Because they hunt whales."

"Why can't you have military coup in Russia? Because in Russia the military coups you."

"In my experience, less than 40% of people wearing ""Duke"" sweatshirts are actual dukes."

"What's an argument in the Middle East but a compliment in the U.S.A? ""You da bomb"" ""No, you da bomb!"""

"Fruits are single-handedly keeping the sticker industry afloat."

"I always enjoy sharing old memories with the @sshole from my old high school... while he is ringing up my groceries."

"/r/jokes/ wins Friend of the Planet award! for 95.001% recycled content."

"Ironically, I only know of one person with the name Common."

"[cop taps on my fogged up car window on make-out hill] ME: *alone holding a huge steamy bucket of fried chicken* what's the problem officer"