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Joke of the Day

"Maybe this is just the wine talking, but I'm fermented grapes inside a guy's stomach making him think he really likes you"

"My friend got a nice new ride, but no one wants to drive him around in it Now he's got all that car and nothing to chauffeur it."

"C-3PO Papa, when C-3PO is naked, he is see-through PO (My 5 1/2 y/o just came up with this. I think it's funny, for a 5 y/o :-))"

"Wanna go to Copenhagen? Amsterdam sure"

"I went to a zoo but the only animal it had was one dog It was a shih tzu"

"[OC] What type of music do Irish people listen to? Pubstep"

"Police arrested 2 kids yesterday, one was drinking battery acid, the other was eating fireworks. They charged one and let the other one off"

"What's the best thing about living in Switzerland? Well, the flags a big plus."

"I asked my web server engineer wife to give me head. All I got was information and not the actual act."

"Asked a Target employee if I could open this camera before I buy it and he said he wouldn't even care if I killed someone in front of him."