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Joke of the Day

"Someone calls 911... Man : Hello? I need your help! 911: Alright, What is it? Man : Two girls are fighting over me! 911: So what's your emergency? Man : The ugly one is winning."

"Can someone's face be a pet peeve?"

"People who pronounce didn't as.""dih-in't"" please doh-on't."

"I've always wondered why china have such a high population. Today I found out, their Condoms are made in China!"

"What came first, internet porn or ""clear all search history""?"

"My girlfriend told me I was average... .. but I think she was just being mean..."

"If somebody at a party tells you they're a writer, get excited, hold up the nearest book, and ask, wide-eyed, ""DID YOU WRITE THIS?"""

"If God is a DJ, life is a dance floor, and love is a rhythm, then you are on LSD."

"I have an irrational fear of large intricate corporate buildings. You could say I have a complex complex complex."

"""You wanna play the rape game?"" ""-No!"" ""-That's the spirit."""