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Joke of the Day

"This restaurant should really be giving me a discount for ordering carryout and not bringing my kids inside."

"I only enter names and numbers into my contacts so I can see who I'm ignoring when they call."

"When I was a kid... 'Too cool for school' meant the boiler had broken and we were all sent home."

"Hipsters is what happens when you tell every child they're special."

"Why can't you hear a pterodactyl urinate? The ""P"" is silent"

"What does a Redditor do at prom? He looks for the punchline"

"What do you call a dinosaur with no eyes? Shut up."

"Who is this Rorschach guy? And why does he paint so many pictures of my parents fighting?"

"I learned that Honey Bees in the United States developed a form of electronics - they're called U.S. Bees."

"""Que?"" (Spanish Inquisition)"