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Joke of the Day

"Husband and wife near wishing well. Suddenly wife slips and fell in the well. Terrified husband: Noooooooooo...I can't believe it's working!"

"Ok everyone enough of your ""family"" time to come back to the internet. We are your real family."

"I have the perfect body of a 21 year old female... It's in a freezer in my basement"

"I once went out with a girl who worked with bees My friends said she was a keeper"

"If your joints pop, snap, and crack when you move your not old... Your just crispy. "

"What is condemned and overused yet as inescapable as a black hole? clickbait -_-"

"This one is pretty offensive... Whats the difference between Jesus and a whore? They both moan when you nail them, but only one of them actually enjoys it."

"(x) calls up a popular restaurant... The owner says, ""Sorry, we don't cater functions."""

"Non-tweeting friend: ""So it's like FB?"" Me: ""Except everyone's mean & sarcastic & brutally honest."" ""Sounds awf..."" ""Awesome. I know."""

"My friend asked me what superpower I wanted I said cold war Russia"