173564

Joke of the Day

"FYI guys: If a girl plays w/ her hair while talking to u, it means she has an itchy scalp, possibly lice. Stay away, it is very contagious."

"If you call a group of lions a pride, and a group of crows a murder; what do you call a group of pedophiles? The British Parliament"

"What do you call a vampire, that follows the rules? Draculaw"

"Holy Kleenex, Batman! He was right under our nose, and we blew it!"

"Why are fish so gullible? They fall for things hook line and sinker!"

"Remember when Michael Jackson hung his baby off that balcony as a goof? He's dead now."

"So a Scottish man is talking to his angry girlfriend.... She goes, ""How many other girls have you had sex with?"" The Scotsman starts counting in his head, but after the 12th sheep, he falls asleep."

"What is the leading cause of dry skin? Bath towels..."

"Tangled earbuds are the new rubik's cube."

"You may recognize me from such films as: HR surveillance footage 11/13/12 HR surveillance footage 01/22/13 HR surveillance footage 02/28/13"