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Joke of the Day

"My Birthday For my birthday I asked for a bicycle, an action man, and a vibrating butt plug... I never got that bike."

"Cheek of my doctor. I went in for a check up and he said I'll never have kids. I said ""why? am I infertile doctor?"" He said ""no your a fat cunt."""

"Today I got a good deal from Comcast."

"Knock Knock Who's there ! Andrew ! Andrew who ? Andrew all her money out of the bank !"

"What do gay horses eat? Horse penis"

"There's an ISIS comedy night coming up... I would go but i'm fairly certain they're all going to bomb."

"Did you hear that Trump said he'd eliminate food safety regulations? It's the only way they can bring Trump steaks back."

"Three feminists walk into a bar. They look at one another and say, ""Hooray! We've taken over a male-dominated joke format!"""

"""You had a life. It was this long. Here's a rock."" - tombstones"

"What do you call a nun who's gone to Heaven? Nun of the above."