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Joke of the Day

"My 8yo's looking for a summer job. He's a pretty decent bartender if anyone's hiring."

"Why did the chicken cross the basketball court? It heard the referee was blowing fowls"

"What do you call a can opener that doesn't work? A unemployed male college graduate."

"Democrats do much of their shopping at Target and Wal-Mart. So do Republicans but they don't admit it."

"I feel bad for Anne Frank She had her diary published for all the world to read, which is every girl's worst nightmare! And she didn't get paid for it, which is every Jew's worst nightmare."

"Clinton is MY president! His second term is about to end but I truly loved his presidency -Sent from internet explorer"

"Damn boy, is your name Dulcolax because you irritate the shit out of me."

"Why doesn't ISIS Like School? Because they always bombed their tests."

"Two gallons of milk sat within a fridge One was spoiled and the other was chocolate. Where did the spoiled milk sit? On the top shelf. Where did the chocolate milk sit? In the back."

"Damn girl, are you a pig? Because your mother looks like a pig. Because you look damn hot bacon in the Sun. Because I want to stuff you like Thanksgiving dinner. . . . More suggestions appreciated"