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Joke of the Day

"Doctor Doctor You've got to help me - I just can't stop my hands shaking Do you drink a lot? Not really - I spill most of it!"

"I got fired from the calendar factory... just for taking a couple of days off"

"How do you comfort a grammar Nazi? ""...They're, their, there."""

"I said ""Candyman"" 5 times into the bathroom mirror and sure enough some woman came out of the stall and screamed at me for being in there."

"What was the buffalo's last words to his teenager as he sent him off to college? Bison"

"Who was the most active of the chinese khanes? Ginseng khan I am in a silly mood. Have a good day"

"They say that 1 out of 3 people has cheated on their relationship I'm not sure if it's my wife or my girlfriend."

"""Stop hitting me."" -Rock bottom."

"Is Google male or female? Female, because it doesn't let you finish a sentence before making a suggestion. ^^^nyuk, ^^^nyuk, ^^^nyuk"

"I called in to work and asked my boss what the difference between work and his daughter was. I'm not coming into work this morning."