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Joke of the Day

"I have been using teeth whitener, and now they are completely oblivious to the experiences and sufferings of other peoples."

"My friend said to me ""people do not change"" I told him to empty his pockets."

"What did the glue taste tester say? Mmmmm."

"Me: What's the point if it's not a little violent, dirty? I wanna feel alive. The blood makes me feel ALIVE. Dentist: Please just floss more"

"A woman went to the doctor, who examined her. He said, You have a bad back. The woman said, I want a second opinion. The doctor said, All right! You're ugly as well."

"Want to hear the smartest thing to ever come out of a woman's mouth? (Bar Joke) Einstein's dick"

"I've said it before and I'll say it again, if you drive a Nissan but don't call it Liam then what is even the point of you"

"Wait, there's a big difference. Did you say I look like THE Rock or did you say I look like A rock?"

"I had an addiction to soap... but thanks to some dirty bastards stealing all of it, I am clean now."

"Old McDonald had a farm and it grew delicious, non-biodegradable french fries."