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Joke of the Day

"I was researching converting to Mormonism until I found out you have to give them 10% of your income I guess I'm Jewish."

"What do you get when cross a joke with a rhetorical question?"

"What did the Mexican guy say when the two houses fell on him? Get off me homes."

"Last week I ordered a vault and some speakers Today they arrived, safe and sound."

"Dear spouse: When I said I needed more physical contact, I was not aiming for you to high five me whenever I walk by..."

"My hamster died today. He fell asleep at the wheel."

"How do you double the price of a Fiat? Fill the tank"

"Did you hear about the man with no arms or legs that swam the English channel? What a cleverdick..."

"TIFU By posting in the wrong subreddit...."

"*gingerly maneuvers the garbage can back into place between a stack of crown molding we'll never use and your antique pesticide collection*"