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Joke of the Day
"I knew my fantasies were getting worse But when I spanked a statue I knew I'd hit rock bottom."
Next Joke
"TRUMP: Let's get that Muslim Band going ""Band? We thought you said ban"" TRUMP: No way, that's harsh. Also, how's that Mexican mall coming?"
"Why /r/Hillaryclinton is a ghost town All their keyboards have water damage."
"How many Man U. fans does it take to change a lightbulb? One to change the lightbulb and one to drive down to Kent to pick him/her up."
"2 gay guys are at a bar. As they near bar what does one say to the other? May I push your stool in."
"What goes up a chimney down, but won't go down a chimney up? An umbrella!"
"How to avoid clickbait? clearly, you wouldn't know..."
"What's a bitch's favorite form of advertisement? A paw pup."
"*UFO attacks* Govt: It's a weather balloon. *UFO destroys Eiffel Tower* Govt: Weather balloon. *UFO conquers Earth* Govt: Weather balloon."
"Do you want to be the greatest superhero of all? Be Alfredo and take out the damn trash. Just told my son this, he hates me now."