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Joke of the Day

"How to avoid clickbait? clearly, you wouldn't know..."

"Saturday night is for moaning My name. Sunday morning is for chanting it."

"Did you hear about the guy who went to the convention of legless women? He heard the place was crawling with pussy."

"Got a buddy who's half Cuban and half Mexican. Came to the U.S. on a raft powered by a weed whacker."

"Went to the hospital to wish a pregnant lady giving birth a Happy Labor Day and she ripped my throat out :("

"Someone stole my mood ring. I dont know how i feel about that."

"theres a train nerd counting the number of ppl that get on and off at every stop. at first i pitied him but he seems happy so now i hate him"

"Opinions are like orgasms... Mine is more important, and I don't really care if you have one."

"What do you call a snake with a degree in engineering? A Boa Constructor"

"You know you're getting old when you have to have a drink to motivate you to go out & have a drink."