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Joke of the Day
"Why do black people like basketball? Because it invovles running, shooting, and stealing."
Next Joke
"Celebrity dumping an ice bucket on himself to raise money? Cute. Humanity dumping an ice cap on itself to raise sea levels? HILARIOUS."
"I scratch your back, you scratch mine. We die from loss of blood."
"What do you call it when you dip poultry and beef in chocolate? Brown-chichen-Brown-cow"
"What's a linguist's favorite beverage? IPA"
"[Jogs to a halt in front of you minutes after a fire truck passes]That guy's (panting) never gonna sell any fire (panting) driving that fast"
"4 out of 5 experts agree that when you put any 5 experts together, 4 out of 5 of them will agree."
"Why were the potato people upset with their leader? He was a dick-tater"
"My partner is a dog person, I'm not. Gets really fucking inconvenient every full moon."
"We'd be scared of beavers if trees screamed."