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Joke of the Day

"What can a lawyer do that a duck can't? Stick his bill up his arse."

"Why can't you tell a Philosophy Student a good joke? You need to give a three hour lecture and turn in a research paper on ""What is 'good'?"" first."

"What do you call a basement full of redditors? A wine cellar."

"I like my women like i like my coffee. Ground up and in the freezer."

"You want to know a neat trick to get yourself to stop being annoyed by a baby crying? Close the lid to the dumpster."

"About to start a new job as a pizza delivery driver, any tips?"

"It's amazing the little things you learn about your kids as they grow everyday. For example today I learned my 3yo is kind of a mean drunk."

"before mcdonald's i bet ""don't buy cheeseburgers from a clown"" was a pretty hard and fast rule"

"How many atheists does it take to change a light bulb? Two. One to actually change the bulb, and the other to videotape so Christians can't claim God did it."

"What do you call Bees that make milk? Boobies I'm so sorry, it's late and my friend just told this joke to me."