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Joke of the Day

"How many atheists does it take to change a light bulb? Two. One to actually change the bulb, and the other to videotape so Christians can't claim God did it."

"Where did Santa meet his wife? Conjunction Junction. They specialize in hooking up words, phrases, and Clauses"

"Just found out I've been eating women's energy bars for the past few months. No side effects except making 30% less money than I used to"

"Why did the black guy wear a suit and tie to his vasectomy? ""Well, if I'm gonna be impotent, I'm gonna look impotent."""

"Do you have oxygen and potassium? Because you seem OK. I'm not sorry"

"Rick Astley is willing to let you borrow any movie from his Pixar collection, with one exception. He's never gonna give you Up."

"What's Michigan's favorite beer? PbR"

"*raises the bar 16 yrs later] Bar: even though you weren't my real father I always wanted to call you, dad. Dad. *me trying not to cry"

"Helped my kid pick out a ""famous past explorer"" for a class assignment. Hope no one else in her class picks Internet Explorer 6."

"When I was in the first grade my teacher could remember my name Which really hurt since I was home-schooled"