171252

Joke of the Day

"A 12 year old posts a selfie, 37 RTs and 1013 likes. I post a selfie, I lose 18 followers and my family disowns me."

"Liverpool have went from SAS to LOLS From Suarez and Sturridge to Lallana Origi Lambert Sturridge"

"*runs thru a couple holding hands like it's the finish line of a marathon."

"Lumberjacks are good at maths because of their log rhythms Thanks, HL Math."

"Dear Santa, Please send your credit card numbers. it's only fair since you're getting the credit for the gifts, that you should start paying for them also.."

"Who is the roundest knight at King Arthur's table? Sir Cumference."

"I may be nodding and smiling, but I'm secretly diagnosing you."

"A couple of million dollar ideas: 1) Boxers with pockets 2) A service that lets you throw a live shark from a speeding van"

"I wear a neck brace to the gym because it makes my physical ineptitude less embarrassing."

"Waiter your tie is in my soup! That's all right sir it's not shrinkable."