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Joke of the Day

"What did one casual necrophiliac say to the other as they left their day jobs? Come by my place later, we'll crack a cold one."

"I love puns about England... They really Brighton my day."

"Rule 34.34 of the internet If it exists, there is a repost of it."

"What are spiders webs good for ? Spiders !"

"There I was, waiting to pay for my landscaping materials, when suddenly... ...I was charged for aggregated basalt."

"My wife says she is really looking forward to the hotel... But I have my reservations."

"We're sorry Micky Mouse, but your wife being crazy is not reasonable grounds for a divorce! I didn't say she was crazy. I said she was fucking Goofy!"

"The neighbors are looking at me strangely again. Like they have never seen a man sitting on his roof with a pair binoculars before."

"My parrot died today... I think its last words were, ""Fuck, I think my parrot is dying."""

"I don't think so, people who are thinking so."