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Joke of the Day

"To make sure everyone cries at my funeral, I'm requesting they play nothing but Creed and Nickleback through factory car speakers."

"What is long, black and smelly? The unemployment line."

"My girlfriend is like a motorcycle I dont have a motorcycle"

"Good Cop: If you confess now, you'll probably just get probation. Fad Cop: Hey Macarena!"

"Why is Canada the part of the Illuminati? Because they have 3 ehs in the name. C-eh-N-eh-D-eh"

"What has seven arms and sucks? Def Leppard"

"You think you have problems, I used a toothpick to get a toothpick out of my teeth this morning."

"A skeleton walks into a bar. He orders a drink, and then asks for a mop."

"Why do Eyeballs Make Great Comedians? Because they are filled with vitreous humor!"

"Why would you be scared to get Ebola? You haven't left your couch since 2011."