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Joke of the Day

"Getting your shit together just sounds unsanitary"

"I took a shop class in high school... It didn't make me a better salesman, but I did learn how to build a franchise in a way I didn't anticipate."

"The council have started asking people what they think of their plans to build a wind turbine off the local coastline. I'm not a big fan."

"Why are men better cooks than women? Because with a sausage, a couple of eggs, and some cream, a man can keep a woman full for 9 months."

"Why did the chicken get into so much trouble? Because of its fowl language."

"Fart John farts in the local market and Jack says: ""What was that ?"" John says: ""That was an atomic bomb"""

"For Christmas last year I got a sweater. This year I'd prefer a moaner or a squirter."

"What do you call a street full of cheap hookers and a McDonald's? Quarter Pound Town."

"Billy Mays is in heaven now... Billy Mays is up in Heaven partying like it's $19.99."

"My dogs name is Nama Only reason is so I can say:""Nama stay"""