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Joke of the Day

"My magic watch say's you don't have any underwear on... Oh, you do?... It must be 15 minutes fast."

"What did the fish say when he hit the wall? Dam!"

"Why did Burger King decide to partner with Dairy Queen instead of McDonalds??? Because she unwrapped his Whopper. I'm so sorry!!!"

"Somebody parked in my spot and now I'm in the market for a rocket launcher."

"My doctor sang this to me at my birthday ""Happy birthday to you. You live in a zoo. You have terminal cancer. Your family'll miss you"""

"You must be pretty famous! After all; bill gates did name his company after your dick."

"Did you hear about the Irishman that was attacked by a carpenter? I heard he was hammered"

"TIL During World War 2 over 200 civilian and resistance soldiers of Albania managed to ambush a convoy of soldiers and destroy their equipment. Reports say the soldiers did nazi them coming"

"Social experiments where skinny people wear fat suits teach us to be nicer to fat people because it might be a skinny person in a fat suit."

"Dwayne Johnson's new television show on the food network Can you cook what The Rock is smelling?"