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Joke of the Day

"Ariel: ""But I love him, daddy!"" *sobs as King Tritan rips her iPhone away and unfollows PrinceEric69*"

"Why was ""C"" afraid of the rest of the alphabet? Because they were ""Nazis""!!!! eyyyyy :D"

"Yo mama's so ugly Even her dildo went limp."

"You should always stay the night with a farmer's daughter... Their morning routine begins with a cock in their ear."

"What is the name of your car? Lady: I forgot the name, but is starts with 'T'. Sardar: Oh, what a strange car, starts with Tea. All cars that I know start with petrol."

"It still takes me a while before I completely trust any woman whose name is mentioned in ""Mambo No. 5""."

"What fungus always gets its ass beat? shittalking mushrooms"

"Q: How can you steal the window seat of a blonde on a plane going to London? A: Tell her the seats that are going to London are all in the middle row."

"Sarah, i understand that you are a feminist... ...but you can't end your prayer with ""awomen"" instead of ""amen"" credits to an anonymous facebook post of which i was too lazy to read the name"

"Urugay still complaining about Suarez punishment: ""Don t forget that 4 human months are 2 dog years."""