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Joke of the Day

"I couldn't understand why the battery in my cell phone was always flat. Then it occurred to me; it wouldn't fit if it was any other shape."

"What kind of jean's do Mario prefer? Denim Denim Denim."

"My hips don't lie. The bastards run around telling everybody how much I like donuts."

"Which anti-virus software do pirates prefer? Avast, ye scurvy dogs!"

"I'm working on organizing a circlejerk. It's coming together."

"Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the idiot's house. Knock Knock. ""Who's there?"" The chicken."

"(Macbeth and lady Macbeth) ""I killed King Duncan"" Macbeth wtf!! ""You told me to!!"" I didn't think you'd do it omg lmao savage"

"A Roman walks into a bar... And he holds up two fingers. ""Five beers, please,"" he asks."

"theres a train nerd counting the number of ppl that get on and off at every stop. at first i pitied him but he seems happy so now i hate him"

"A lady came up to me in the middle of the street asking for help So I gave her my AIDS"