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Joke of the Day

"What kind of wine does Bruce Lee pair with a fish dinner? None, he just has some WATAH!"

"How do you know when a movie is going to be shitty? There are more than 1 SNL cast members in it"

"I saw a dwarf escaping prison yesterday, and as he was climbing down the outer fence he turned and sneered at me. I thought to myself, that's a little condescending."

"Wife: I want to see some snow. Me: You might get to see 3 to 4 inches tonight. Wife: I'd rather see snow."

"What's the difference between incest porn and regular porn? The mute button."

"""I'd like to prescribe you a topical ointment for that skin condition,"" my doctor said. ""Woah, woah, woah, doc,"" I replied. ""Let's not make any rash decisions."""

"Why are white girls so odd? Because they can't even."

"""My uncle is a dead person guy"". Me last night when I couldn't think of the word mortician"

"For my new tattoo, I'm totally getting a chest piece of a chess piece, cause its fun to be a pun."

"What did 0 say to 8 ? Nice belt!"