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Joke of the Day

"My Granddad committed suicide. He drove off a cliff. Everyone was screaming and shouting at him telling him not to do it. Then again he was a bus driver."

"Detective: Why did you dump those vegetables on my desk? Criminal: You said it was time to spill the beans."

"What kind of chemical bond is Hispanic? An Ester Bond"

"I like to buy books, but I never read them. I just want them for my shelf."

"Sea cucumbers are actually animals, so regular cucumbers are either lying or they need to step their game up."

"On Monday nights, I give my plants the pleasure of a striptease show by watering them with ice cubes."

"There's a very thin line between having your foot out of the covers enough to stay cool but not enough so it gets eaten by monsters."

"What is faster than a black person with your TV ? His brother with your DVD player."

"Did you hear about the murder mystery porno? In the end, everyone did it."

"What is beethoven doing in his grave Decomposing haha it's funni"