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Joke of the Day

"Why is everything lying on the floor? my mom asked Gravity, I replied."

Next Joke
 
"Ever heard of Black Jesus? I hear he's pretty hung."
"[Mesozoic era] God: if u can't spell ur name you're going extinct Jellyfish: seems fair Pterodactyl: [to Brachiosaurus] this is bullshit"
"What does a proofreader have in common with a vampire? They search for type-os"
"What do you call a Chinese woman with one leg? Irene."
"Excuse me, do you like graves? Yeah, I dig 'em."
"In the beginning, God created the earth and rested. Then God created man and rested. Then God created woman. Since then, neither God or man has rested."
"What do you call a dog in a diving bell? A sub-woofer"
"So pi and the imaginary number are talking... and i says to pi, ""be rational."" Pi responds, ""u shut ur bitch-ass whore mouth or im gon shank u mofo"" and i says, ""Oh shit just got real."""
"Come this Tuesday I will no longer be a 40 year old virgin. I will be a 41 year old virgin..."