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Joke of the Day
"i'm so bad at rock-paper-scissors, last time i accidently joined a street gang."
Next Joke
"Hi and welcome to the hidden chair club. Please find a seat."
"I tried watching Inception with Twitter on. I still don't know what Juno was doing in their dreams."
"Why do ruler manufacturers make a big thing about them being shatterproof? Was there a ruler shattering epidemic that necessitated this?"
"Memories. That's how I want to be remembered."
"How come Apple-products have so small transistors? Children have very small hands"
"If Jesus loves me how come he's never liked a single one of my instagram selfies"
"Shopping for houses, it seems like a lot of the houses in my price range need some TLC... But I don't want no scrubs."
"What do you call a cheap hooker? A bang for your buck."
"Hey General Motors, what about an electronic drum set on the steering wheel? You're welcome."