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Joke of the Day

"This Prius we rented is pretty sweet. It can go 0-60 in 6 hours."

"*looks gift horse in the mouth Gift Horse: Hey, my eyes are up here."

"What's the difference between a girl's argument and a knife... The knife has a point."

"George Ezra must really love his calculator if he wrote a song about it. *Cassy O'*"

"Every time you make a typo... the errorists win"

"Waiter is there soup on the menu ? No madam I wiped it off !"

"I have trouble ending small talk. Some guy I started talking to in 1998 on a bus is still talking to me. His name is Gary. He hates rain."

"Sherlock was gardening when Watson came over and asked what he was planting. ""A lemon tree, Watson""."

"What has four legs, is big, green, and fuzzy, and if it fell out of a tree on top of you, would kill you? A pool table."

"It makes me a little sad that shaking a vending machine might be the closest I ever come to fighting a robot."