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Joke of the Day
"If you like The Onion, take a look at The Ironic Times"
Next Joke
"If a woman has eight vaginas... She'd be an octopus."
"""Sir, we are mining too many useless ores"" *Hitler rubs chin* So mine less. [GRAMMAR NAZI BUSTS IN] ""MINE FEWER."" [Hitler looks up] Yes?"
"I feel like I'm diagonally parked in a parallel universe."
"Using Romeo & Juliet to express how inlove you are is like using Hamlet to show how close and well adjusted your family life is."
"a group of ducks are gathered around a ouija board. the glass slowly moves, B-R-E... *the ducks tense up* ...A-D *ducks go fuckin nuts*"
"Two Ninjas What do you call two ninjas named Charlie, stranded outside on a cold night? Numchucks."
"I believe, if you're in Special Ed, and you're late to class... ...it's politically incorrect to say you're tardy."
"An unconscious man arrives at a hospital... After a series of x-rays, the radiologist discovered the man had several plastic horses in his anus. The doctors have declared his condition as ""stable""."
"Why was everyone scared of 7? Because 7 was a registered six offender"