104414
Joke of the Day
"Why was everyone scared of 7? Because 7 was a registered six offender"
Next Joke
"How many hipsters does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Some really obscure number, you've probably never heard of it."
"Pregnant women go through a ""nesting"" phase where they make a tree fort out of twigs and parts of men they've killed."
"So I was petting a duckling the other day... you could say I was feeling a little down."
"Whenever I put on my Ocean Pacific (op) pants I feel I must say something meaningful."
"While climbing barefoot up mountains to meditate, Ghandi would squeeze garlic into his mouth to deal with hunger pains from fasting super calloused fragile mystic with extra halitosis"
"Breaking News: horse in barn has emergency operation... Update: do not worry, he is in a stable condition."
"My favorite oxymorons: 1. Jumbo shrimp. 2. Act natural. 3. Boneless ribs. 4. Civil war. 5. Freezer burn. 6. Adult male. 7. Happy marriage."
"What's a pirate's favorite letter? The C."
"I'm at work for another hour and my phone's at 14%. If I don't make it to the end of the day, tell all my friends, ""Not much u"""