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Joke of the Day

"Girls. Don't get upset if your twitter crush stars a really hot girl or even retweets her cause she is prolly really a dude. Stay calm."

"Me: ""people always think I'm gay! Do I put off a gay vibe?"" Guy whose back I'm massaging in a bubble bath: ""maybe a little"""

"I was searching for bear photos When I made a grizzly discovery"

"What do you call a hockey line with Connor McDavid, Taylor Hall, and Nail Yakupov? The Lottery Line"

"What did the rock say when he had to leave his girlfriend for a long time? I pumice I'll come back soon!"

"What did the Korean family call their dog? Stu"

"What's the difference between batman and a black man One can go into the store without robbin"

"I've always wanted to improve my knowledge of Greek Mythology.... It's been my achilles elbow for quite some time."

"Did you hear about that actress that got stabbed the other day? What was her name, Reese... > Witherspoon? No, it was with a knife."

"What do you call two brown people in a sleeping bag? Twix."