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Joke of the Day
"I just want a car with pop-up headlights. Do they still make those? Love would be good too."
Next Joke
"[Cop questioning suspected watermelon thief] COP: *squints* Was it you? GIRAFFE (who has watermelon-sized bulge halfway down his neck): Nope"
"What's the ugliest shape? An eyesoresceles triangle."
"Twitter is the world's largest voluntary police lineup."
"Mr.Bond caught pants down ""Ah, Mr Bond, I-"" *closes laptop lid and pulls up trousers* ""-wasn't expecting you."""
"What did the triangle say to the preacher? Forgive me father for I have sin()."
"What instant coffee and Sasha Grey have in common? 3 in 1"
"How did the pepper end up getting killed? A salt with deadly weapon"
"I fart, why..because it's the only gas I can afford."
"Never date a tennis player. Love means nothing to them."