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Joke of the Day

"the similarities between a wife and a grenade if you pull the ring off, the house is gone"

"What do you get if you cross a sheepdog with a jelly ? The collie wobbles !"

"Have you guys seen the Hitler biopic starring Mike Tyson? I just watched it and I don't think Mike really got his character down. He kept saying he hated juice."

"How to handle a one night stand the next morning 1. Put on Titanic 2. He's gone, that's it"

"Doctor Doctor I keep thinking I'm a snake about to shed it's skin. Why don't you go behind the screen and slip into something more comfortable then!"

"This is probably the best idea I've had yet! -me, right before I do something stupid"

"What does relative humidity mean to a redneck? The sweat that forms on your nuts when you're banging your sister."

"[Mr. Robot] I may be late... ...and, for sure, Edward Alderson is late, but Christian's later"

"What falls first an apple or a black man? An apple because the balackman hangs."

"I once knew a soldier who suffered through both mustard gas and pepper spray. He was a seasoned veteran."