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Joke of the Day
"I hope you guys realize that sunflower seeds are salted little plant babies."
Next Joke
"What is the hardest part about playing soccer? Telling your parents that you're gay."
"How did 1337 Jesus escape his tomb? (X-Post from ProgrammerHumor) He used an encrypted key."
"Whenever I'm tempted to talk shit to a perfect stranger on Reddit I always remember my mother's wise words: ""Shut your fucking mouth, no one cares what you think."""
"Two guys walk into a bar.... You would think the first guy would've warned the other."
"What are the two sexiest barn yard animals? Brown-chicken-brown-cow"
"A girl once told me she was getting drunk off of my love.... ... I told her that's just the date rape drug kicking in."
"I once had a math test in an elevator... I was wrong on so many levels."
"How many cops does it take to change a lightbulb? Five. One to change the bulb and four to beat the shit out of the black guy who was originally hired to change the bulb."
"if people really didn't want to hear smartass responses they wouldn't keep asking questions like ""do you know why i pulled you over?"""