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Joke of the Day

"Computers manufacturer is considering changing the command ""Press Any Key"" to ""Press Return Key"" because of the flood of calls asking where the ""Any"" key is."

"Have you heard? Have you heard of the Arkadian Genocide? Exactly."

"""Waiter ! Have you got frogs' legs ? "" ""No sir I always walk this way"""

"If you like someone, pretend they're a charger and you're an iPhone on 1%. Run to them. Grab them. Plug them in. Wait, I lost the metaphor."

"243 [Slightly NSFW] You asked for it :D Edit: Holy hell this one actually got some attention."

"Monica Lewinsky released a statement on Hillary Clinton's run for president ""I will not vote for Hillary,"" she said. ""The last Clinton president left a bad taste in my mouth."""

"Do you ever feel bored on reddit, because you read everything already? I guess you could say you've reddit already"

"How's your homophone needlepoint project coming along? Sew sew"

"Two peanuts were walking down the street. And one was As-salted."

"I can never tell if my cat left a dead bird at my door, or if it's the dead bird I ordered from Amazon."