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Joke of the Day
"How do you stop a dog from humping your leg? Pick him up and suck his dick."
Next Joke
"""Are you listening to understand or to be right?"" ~ sometimes pretending to listen results in unexpected mutiple choice questions"
"What do you say when you are comforting a grammar Nazi? there, their, they're."
"Trump is the 45th President of the United States. Aren't you proud fellow Americans."
"What's scary about a white man in prison? You know he did it"
"TIFU by whipping the wrong person at the BDSM club. Whoops, wrong sub."
"I saved $38 by moving the fish tank in front of the TV during ""Ellen"" and telling my kids it was Finding Dory."
"Just finished reading a book about Stockholm syndrome. It was pretty bad at the start but by the end I liked it."
"Next time someone catches you talking to yourself, make it worthwhile by laughing, yelling ""Good one!"" and high-fiving the air."
"Why did the tofu cross the road? To prove it wasn't chicken. >:|"