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Joke of the Day

"Why did Hitler kill himself? He finally got the gas bill."

"The German folk singer was very dishonest with me. You could say that he lied."

"They won't give me insurance on my phones anymore, but yet they don't make phones that survive being thrown against walls? It's nonsense..."

"I gave my dad a two handed high-five once when I was 10. I had to spend the next 12 years convincing him I wasn't gay."

"How my 7 year old plays board games: Rolls a 6. Counts to 6. Moves his piece wherever he wants."

"The best thing about adolescent humor... is that it never gets old!"

"What is Yoda's last name? Layhehoo"

"Two women want to form a project group... Turns out it was a real misfit."

"It's so annoying when I'm about to take a great photo and somebody calls my camera."

"Before company arrives we like to clean our house so there's no evidence that we live like circus monkeys the other 364 days of the year!"