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Joke of the Day

"Why was the belt locked up? Because it held a pair of pants."

"Did you guys hear that Lorena Bobbitt was recently involved in a traffic accident in L.A.? Apparently some prick cut her off."

"If you feel like your parents didn't hug you enough as a child then it's probably because they didn't really want you. Good talk."

"what did the peanut say to the squirrel ??? he said im hungry and I'm as tired as a tree"

"Can all 16gb iPhone users send a screenshot of their storage page? No sorry I don't have enough storage to take a screenshot."

"As I was finishing a round of golf during a lightning storm, I was suddenly struck ...by how peaceful my game was with no one else on the course. I should do this more often!"

"How do you tell if someone has an std? Oh shit wrong sub-reddit."

"My kids lost a Barbie shoe. I dug in the trash and found one. It was from a set they didn't know was missing Now I'm looking for 2 shoes."

"Communicating with Cattle by I. Ken Mooue"

"What was Han Solo's reaction to being taken to the carbon-freezing chamber? He was petrified."