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Joke of the Day

"The state of New Mexico.. When they named the state of New Mexico were they degrading the state or honoring Mexico? it seemed funnier when I first said it. is this how it always happens?"

"Where do all them scrub gamers live? Pleblos"

"*jumps into volcano as sacrifice* *volcano spits me back out*"

"So with the iPhone 6S coming out... I'm guessing it will be a huge 6-s."

"I admire women with the restraint to draw on their eyebrows. I wouldn't be able to stop until I'd added glasses and a moustache."

"Told my friends I couldn't make it to happy hour. Didn't tell them it's because I want to sit around sans pants and eat cheese for a while."

"Yo mama's so mean... She's got no standard deviation!"

"Whats the difference between a woman and a dog? Put them both in the trunk of your car, drive around the block, and see which ones happy to see you afterwards."

"Cells multiply by dividing."

"""OH MY GOD YOU'RE A DOG HEY SMELL ME I'M A DOG TOO"" - dogs"