165156

Joke of the Day

"1 in 5 Americans with a Twitter account complain about his/her damn stupid job every fucking Monday."

"What did the Red Queen say at the orgy? ""Off with their heads!"""

"A handsome man came up to me today & said ""Hi what's your name?"" I said ""You on Twitter?"" He said ""No"" We're getting married on Monday!"

"An Irishman walks into a bar Every night and then he stays there until it closes."

"Moon Landing conspiracy theorists should be called Luna-tics Just posting here because r/showerthoughts doesn't allow puns."

"As a non-US-redditor I don't understand why right-wing gun nuts don't get along better with left-wing SJWs... ...they both seem to love triggers so much."

"What's the difference between Trump and a Tree? Only one can get stumped..."

"How do you make a faggot have sex with a woman? Shit in her cunt."

"I know a mathematician who can't afford lunch. He can binomial."

"Why did the French chef quit working at the haunted restaurant? He got creped out."