165021

Joke of the Day

"You probably get this a lot but... *punches you in the face*"

"All you need is WD-40 and duct tape. If it doesn't move and it should, use WD-40. If it moves and shouldn't, use the tape."

"I told my boyfriend that a penis is like a nipple They are shaped sort of like a nipple, they sometimes squirt white stuff, and it's an erogenous zone. He said ""yea, and mine feeds babies."""

"If your New Year's resolution involves less drinking or cursing, it involves less of me."

"Why was the origami class cancelled? The school folded."

"Kim, Kourtney and Khloe. The only KKK that will let bIack guys inside them."

"Last night I was at the bar and this guy kept yelling ""bastard"" at his pint of beer. It's never nice to witness substance abuse."

"Did you see the Broadway musical about the dictionary? It's a play on words."

"Since Trump got elected 2.5 million Americans want to leave the country That's 2.5 million jobs he's already made!"

"Always a housemaid, never a house."