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Joke of the Day
"You know, redheads... are pumpkin spiced all year round."
Next Joke
"If this evening got any more bland and disappointing it would be a menu item at Applebee's."
"Funny that when a guy sleeps with tons of girls, he's called a stud... But when a girl does the same she's called a lesbian."
"Her: Oh, you brought me flowers! Me: Yes, one of the many benefits of living next door to a graveyard..."
"Sometimes ""I'm single"" means ""I'm drama free"", ""less stressed"" and ""I refuse to settle for less."""
"How does Microsoft count to 10? 1, 2, 3, 95, 98, ME, NT, 2000, XP, Vista, 7, 8, 10."
"Where does the bride of Frankenstein have her hair done? At the ugly parlour."
"What's yellow and covers assholes? The Lakers uniform."
"Why won't Derek Zoolander vote for Hillary Clinton? Because he can't turn left."
"When I was 5, my Uncle Bob asked me to sit on his lap. It was quite touching, really."