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Joke of the Day

"First joke I ever told. You know what a hypocrite is? A guy that hates cats, but loves pussy."

"Mercurian day So - apparently one day on Mercury is an agonisingly long 1408 earth hours long... In other words - one Earth Monday."

"I asked an LAPD officer to tell me a joke All he said was ""Black teenagers civil rights"""

"I tried making jokes about fat people ... but none of them worked out."

"As much as I disagree with Donald Trumps policies, we agree one one major and vital thing... We would both love to fuck his daughter."

"I hate reddit because... ...you cannot take a joke!"

"What's the difference between being hungry and horny? Where you put the cucumber."

"If you have time to check into a gas station on Foursquare, you have too much time on your hands"

"[pun] I wanted to be a personal trainer... But I was too scrawny and had to hand in my too weak notice. (Credits to Adrian, badass Chef)"

"When I was a little kid, I would wait up all night waiting for santa to come. Then there was an awkward silence when he got up, put his pants on, and left."