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Joke of the Day

"What do you call an IT teacher who touches up his students? A PDF file."

"Where do conspiracy theorists keep their ideas? In a skeptic tank. --- (Note: I just made up this joke earlier today. I'm not 100% sure the joke is obvious; feel free to suggest a better wording!)"

"I like my women like I like my vacuum cleaners Cordless and with powerful suction"

"Don't email me a link to a 6 minute youtube video. I wouldn't watch a video that long if in contained clues to solve my own murder."

"Did you hear about the world's greatest ninja...? Me neither."

"So, if someone who works for the Postal Service did an AMA and answered every single question... ...does that mean OP delivered?"

"My wife is so married that she even stopped blowing out the candles on her birthday cake cause she doesn't want me gettin' any ideas."

"I hate it when people ask me what I'll be doing in three years... I don't have 2020 vision!"

"According to my Nike fitness app, I watched TV for 6 miles this week."

"""Just spots"" ""I keep seeing spots in front of my eyes."" ""Did you ever see a doctor?"" ""No, just spots."""