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Joke of the Day
"Why couldn't Jesus's eat m&m's? They kept falling threw the holes in his hands."
Next Joke
 
"[first day as a doctor] You seem depressed. Also you look underweight, how's your diet? [nurse interrupts me] ""Dr that's the model skeleton"""
"How does JokeExplainBot work? Having all that trivial information must be a big distraction..."
"""He's no longer updating iTunes."" - A very modern way of saying someone died"
"*accidentally walks into women's restroom* *plays it cool* *sits down* *finds comfort here* *changes name to Janice* *is alive* *is free*"
"Today I met a guy who said he was a Premature Ejaculator He came out of nowhere"
"Why did the cookie smoke weed? Because he wanted to get baked."
"You're probably wondering how I tweet so much while maintaining a loving marriage and two amazing kids. The key is neglect."
"TIL that Geneva has the biggest meeting place for Homosexual scientists in the world. It's called the ""Large Hardon Collider"""
"Guys: What should you do if you drop your wallet in San Francisco? Kick that shit to Oakland!!"