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Joke of the Day

"If you stare in a mirror long enough and start screaming, you'll see angry faces of figures dressed in orange. *only works at Home Depot"

"Mayweather goes 48-0 49-0 if you count his wife"

"1. Stand in sauna 2. Add 30,000 strangers 3. Take 2 steps every 30 seconds 4. Repeat for 12 hours Congratulations! How was Disneyworld?"

"What happens when you drink food colouring? You dye a little on the inside."

"Just once I'd like to walk down the aisle, take my vows, say I do... Without being dragged out being told, ""Ma'am, you're not the bride..."""

"I can't figure out if I only date girls with self esteem issues because I'm ugly or because we have something in common"

"Have you ever smelled mothballs? How did you get their tiny legs apart?"

"Why do Asains have small penises they don't like being 'rong'"

"What's the difference between a snowman and a snowwoman? the snowBALLS"

"I saw two really fat people today talking... Looked like a heavy discussion"