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Joke of the Day
"What did the man say to his wife when he failed to get an erection? No hard feelings."
Next Joke
"""Mos Def"" is my favorite rapper named after a girl who doesn't actually plan on hanging out with you."
"I think the government just un-friended us."
"I have 7,777 followers. Shouldn't coins be coming out of my computer or something? #gyp"
"Schrodinger's Omlette Up until you flip the omelette, you don't know if it's an omelette or scrambled eggs. If it flips, omelette it is If it doesn't, scrambled it is"
"What did the slice of pork say to the attractive woman.... ....you may be hot, but I'm bacon!!!"
"If you're doing nothing wrong, you have nothing to hide from the giant surveillance apparatus the government's been hiding."
"Jesus dies for our sins? No, no, no... He died for YOUR sins. I haven't touched a goat inappropriately since third grade."
"New York Sports"
"Why did Hitler commit suicide ? Because he couldn't pay the gas bill"